Advice For Recent Loss

To The Newly Bereaved After Suicide
By LaRita Archibald, Founder of HEARTBEAT Groups for mutual support for survivors in the aftermath of suicide

Grieving is a unique, lonely, extremely painful process with each individual working through their own space at their own pace, but it is comforting to know what helped others who have experienced the anguish in the aftermath of a loved one's suicide.

"Give sorrow words. Grief has need to speak, lest whisper the o'er fraught heart and bid it break." — Wm. Shakespeare/Macbeth

1. Talk! Talk! Talk! Speak of your pain and loss for as long and as often as you need to speak of it.
2. Be with your grief. Don't suppress, avoid, or postpone grief's expression. Let yourself feel it! Cry! Tears are cathartic and cleansing.
3. Let your friends give what they offer — to be with you, to share a meal, to run errands, to listen to your heartbreak.
4. Accept invitations — consider being with your closest friends at small gatherings. Social events provide the mind momentary respite.
5. There is healing power in humor. It's OK to laugh. Laughter is healthy and healing.
6. Re-establish routine in your life as soon as possible. People thrive on orderliness.
7. Care for your physical appearance — it is a critical step toward restoring well-being.
8. Provide the best opportunity for restful sleep by avoiding stimulants. Exercise is nature's anti-depressant.
9. Take the best possible care of yourself — eat properly, pace yourself, and don't dismiss physical symptoms.
10. Grief and the workplace — discuss your limits and concerns with your employer.
11. Suicidal thoughts are scary — it is normal to want to escape the pain. If you are obsessed with thoughts of ending your life, see a mental health professional without delay.